My sister’s husband doesn’t appreciate my titles…
JAY, as I’ve mentioned before, is full of great ideas. What I need to be clear about is that sometimes her ideas involve a lot of work for MHG and me.
Case Study: Strawberry Picking
I like the idea of picking my own strawberries, I do. I like it even better when it comes with a fantastic, if not appropriately sized, cowboy hat to protect my youthful skin from the sun.
(Note: MHG likes the idea of picking OUT his own strawberries — driving up to a stand, pointing at the ones he likes best, paying and driving away.)
So last summer when JAY suggested a trip to Bauman’s Farm Market and Cider Mill, I agreed to be a part. When we arrived, JAY selected 9 empty quarts and we set off into the fields….and by we I mean MHG and me.
Snippity-snapping away, JAY spent the first half-hour taking photos. It was only after I had nearly filled 2 full quarts that she began to contribute to her 3-quart quota.
Migrant Worker #1 (that’s me) outperformed the rest. Efficient as ever, I loaded up 4 brimming quarts. I swear, I don’t try, these opportunities to shine, these chart-topping performances just fall into my lap.
Here are some of my other un-sought-after crowns:
Health-Care Worker #1— based on the quantity of blood loss or lack of blood loss in my case.
Adult-Dance-Sampler Tapper #1— although I do not have moves named after me like Juanita, and Emily did temporarily play the part of dance class nemesis, at least I’m not ‘Simply the Worst.’
Eat your heart out Gu-ass…
Filed under: Bizarre
